When will you realize that he does not love you?
I wrote this message to a dear friend who has been abandoned by her beloved without a reason then he appeared in her life suddenly exactly as he disappeared. Thus, I would like to share it with other women. It might cure a broken heart.
“How much it hurts me my dear to see you crying badly for a man who didn’t really love you. However, what hurts me more that your innocent heart still wishes for his return one day. Thus, I will write to you as I did not do for anyone before, and I will tell you secrets about men you never heard from your mom. In fact, men themselves would be scared of you to know. Read it, memorize it and remember it whenever you feel longing to him.
It is not your fault that you grew up in a society makes your life revolve in an orbit around the man. Since your childhood you hear them say to your mother (May God give you next time a boy), during your adolescence (Shame on you: you are a girl not a boy), in your youth (Did anyone propose to you?), in your Adulthood (where is your guardian?) and in elderliness (he has the right to remarry, and you have to be patient and satisfied).
It is not your fault that your mother did not see your beauty, and teased you for not having fair skin or slim body as a daughter of someone else and isolated you so neighbours cannot say rumour. She is controlled by the community‘s unforgiving outlook. We spend our lives trying to please it to achieve the impossible acceptance for a female. What your mother did not mention is that you are very beautiful but your bad luck made it incompatible with ridiculous societal beauty measurements. Your mother forgot to tell you that you are unique and impressive when you be as you want to be and not as what the people want.
It is not a sin to look for love, or to be in love, or to fall in love. Love is not a sin, love is not a scandal … how unjustly we treat love, how deliberately we disgrace it… If you fall in love one day, do not ever feel guilty. Love is the purest crime!
If your beloved left without a farewell, do not ask why? Do not say if I was or if I did or I was the reason. Do not leave your door open or even ajar… wishing his return and have mercy on your tears … Close the door behind and be sure that life will open doors for you… The man who truly loves you will not leave you, will not suddenly disappear, throwing your feelings to the wind … The Sun will rise, moon will wane, winter and summer will rotate… The universe will not stop because of his departure. Then why do you stop your life waiting for him? And wasting your most beautiful times looking for news of him?
The man who truly loves you will not make up thousand excuses (why you cannot be together) … Do not believe a man says to you (destiny) or (I cannot)… He is a liar my dear… more of a lair than the mirage of our desert … If a man really loves you, he will fight the world to reach you… When will you realize that he never loved you? He is now looking for a way out to hide his failure of being a real man at a time when there are few real men.
The top and bottom of it, my dear, promise me to get rid of your sadness and read “Ahlam Mostghanami’s” book, “Forgetting you” which taught me what my straying experiences did not. I will reveal to you some serious advice for Ahlam who revealed the secrets of men: “Do not chase a faraway star. The sky has other stars. Maybe your next lucky strike is the moon. Thus, love him as no woman did and forget him as men do”.
My great love,